The thirst that safety couldn’t kill.⚘
Where did this thirst come from?
Well. With broken hearts, you can never tell.
⚘
Warning, warning to you
live a life that was not meant for you.
A warning to live a boring life,
a safe life
that should also come with a warning.
⚘
You think the safe life is the safest life?
After you’ve been through abuse
you think safe choices were going to save your life?
⚘
But let me tell you this, my rose sisters:
it’s not always like that.
⚘
You think the safest choice will save your life?
Well,
the safest choice,
depending on how long you stay,
could lead you to lose your mind.
⚘
Slowly, slowly,
your endless thirst,
a seed growing,
soon becoming a whole universe
that could eat your whole body alive.
⚘
Slowly, slowly, slowly,
the safety could eat you whole.
⚘
Where are you now?
Stuck between the dangerous,
that could risk your life,
and the safety that is drowning you slowly.
The longer you starve your soul, the harder it will hunger. What you were never allowed to feel will one day demand everything.
So Where Do You Go After Survival?
⚘
Not all danger comes with chaos, some arrives disguised as comfort. The safest choices can become the longest way back to yourself.
But the risk is not stopping there.
The next risk is after the safety.
The cage that protects you can
also erase you.
After the years of safety.
⚘
The real risk,
is that you become obsessed
with what you have longed for your whole life.
⚘
So when the new chance arrives,
because of this broken heart,
you will risk everything
if you cannot drink from the new spell placed on you.
⚘
So what do you do now?
What do you do now?
⚘
You stand between
the Storm and the Cage.
Trying to survive
echoes of abuse,
echoes of suffocating safety
and now, now, now
⚘
you’re obsessed.
⚘
Because you have longed for it so long
that you have abandoned yourself.
Over and over again,
you have abandoned yourself.
Fear builds walls but maybe maybe if we are lucky:
longing breaks them all at once.
⚘
But. What feels like salvation
can be another spell. A veil of light.
⚘
The danger after safety is
forgetting how to choose yourself.
⚘
So now,
what do you do?
Where do you go?
⚘
You feel desperate.
You feel obsessed.
⚘
And it’s not an easy thing, I can tell you.
You are both scared, suspicious
but also open,
and longing for it all.
⚘
Your Longing Becomes a Universe.
⚘
Longing to surrender
and trust.
Trust.
⚘
But how can we trust you now?
Trust.
How can we trust you now,
after all we have been through?
⚘
How?
⚘
(Selfportrait by Sabina Tabakovič who loves red lips & bare feet. She is forever the queen witch whose soul answers only to the wild.)